To really create a meaningful life and love it, of course there are many things to DO, but before you throw yourself into your next plan, I want you to consider something that I find is key to succeeding – in business, relationships, physical health and wellbeing – and that is self-compassion.
You may be aware of how compassionate you are to other people, but do you really know how compassionate you are with yourself? I love the following 5 questions that author Elisha Goldstein created to help you assess the strength of your self-compassion muscle: (I’ve added a few questions to deepen the assessment)
- Where does the inner critic pop up? At work? When you walk past the mirror? In relationships? In relation to parenting?
- What are the repercussions of being so hard on yourself?
- When something difficult arises in life and you fall under stress, where do you rank on the priority list of people to take care of? Do you apply caring to your suffering or try to avoid it?
- When things are tough, do you tend to compare yourself with others, thinking that they have it together? Or do you have a balanced perspective, knowing that all humans struggle?
- What would the days, weeks, and months ahead be like if your stress and inner struggles were met with more understanding and caring?
Tenderness, Self-Compassion and Mindfulness
I appreciate the questions because I find them mindful and direct your attention towards yourself, gently. Tenderness is one of the tenets of Mindfulness – to look at yourself as if you were talking to a great friend or child.
Take a moment to answer each question thoughtfully as you will see a clear picture of how weak or strong is your compassion muscle. Take another moment and write out, “How could I show up in a compassionate and loving way for myself?” This might be absolutely a new thing for you. If so, I say, “Yay you! Listen up!” If you are strong is this area, wonderful. I would still encourage you to be aware of your answer to question #2. When you look closely at what you are causing in your life due to a weak sense of self-compassion, you can feel a sense of inspiration to make some changes.
If this resonates with you and you would like to finally tame your inner critic and connect with the power of self-compassion then book a session with me below. You’ll be instantly more free and purposeful than ever before!
You are so brilliant, beautiful and valuable. Treat yourself as the precious gift you are and you’ll begin to feel the fun, joy and power of being alive!